STORY INFO
Lost
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Author
Cedric Busteed
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Categories
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Danh mục
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Update
1 year ago
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Part Chapter
1/??
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Reads
74
Content
“Don’t eat that.”Ashley jumped away as the cold words slithered up her arm and into her ears. She darted her head around to find the source of the voice, to no avail. It took a few moments before she realized that she didn’t remember hearing the words. No, she felt them like a chilling breeze slipping into her mind.She stepped away from the bright mushroom, perched tantalizingly on a rotten tree ...
Outstanding reviews
A great submission with some superb vivid imagery at the start:« the cold words slithered up her arm and into her ears » followed swiftly by: « she didn’t remember hearing the words. No, she felt them like a chilling breeze slipping into her mind. » - very powerful! Certainly had me hooked.I also like the ghost’s sense of humour :« What is thy name?!”“Lady, I died in ’09. Not 1709, just 2009. No need to do the theatrics » 😂& then:« Jesus!”“No, Jeff. » 😂😂Bravo! 👏
Thanks! Jeff was fun to write for.
This is pretty good! I did think the paragraph explaining how mushrooms work and that some of them are poisonous to protect their fruiting bodies was a little unneeded as most of your audience will know at least that some mushrooms are poisonous and that's all that the story requires. However, I loved SO MUCH about this story. I love mycology, I love bears, I love forests. Jeff is such a likable and sweet character and I love that we get his story in little pieces. I adored the whole read, thank you for writing. :)
😊
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