STORY INFO
Marie Antoinette
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Author
Molly Kelash
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Categories
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Danh mục
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Update
1 year ago
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Part Chapter
1/??
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Reads
190
Content
Squat, beige and Soviet, the Marie Antoinette Apartments stood against the stale gray Minneapolis sky. Irony of the worst kind, he thought, blandly ugly and unconscious. He would take exquisitely self-aware irony any day over this three-story architectural monstrosity, “classed up” with tacked on ionic Greek columns, harsh blue LED Christmas lights wrapped inexpertly around them, canned Christmas classics pumping through the air.God, this place was only better than minimum security prison by a hair. But it was all he cou...
Outstanding reviews
Thank you, Zack, for your time and attention to this. I appreciate your view into my (attempt) to take all of the "tell" I could out of this story. Sometimes it felt like I was cutting too close to the bone, but I'm glad the final effect left you with a sense of lushness. And yeah, I had fun with the lack of quotation marks...leaving them out absolutely felt like a Jeb state of mind thing. Best of luck to you as well!
Thank you, Zack, for your time and attention to this. I appreciate your view into my (attempt) to take all of the "tell" I could out of this story. Sometimes it felt like I was cutting too close to the bone, but I'm glad the final effect left you with a sense of lushness. And yeah, I had fun with the lack of quotation marks...leaving them out absolutely felt like a Jeb state of mind thing. Best of luck to you as well!
Good catch on the Christmas Carol elements--they were very intentional! I'm glad that you read his transformation as gradual because I was afraid with the limited wc it might seem too insta. Truly appreciate your insightful read and feedback. :)
Congratulations on the win!
Thank you, Michał!!!!
I'm just a teenager and also a storyteller. I hope one day I can write in the way you did. While reading this, I really felt something real but it was also like a dream. Thank you ! And I hope you always keep expressing your feelings in this way,by writing...
Thank you for your kind words, Ruveyha. I write all the time and am constantly perfecting, which it sounds like you are doing as well, so brava to you. Keep on keepin' on!
Thank you for your kind words, Ruveyha. I write all the time and am constantly perfecting, which it sounds like you are doing as well, so brava to you. Keep on keepin' on!
Thank you, Jeannette. There is definitely a bit of a Grinch in Jeb! I'm glad you could overcome the lack of quotation mark--it was really a stylistic choice that felt right in the moment, something to match Jeb's joyless view of the world. Glad it didn't ultimately hamper your enjoyment of the story. :)
I recently worked with someone who mentioned how therapist/client interactions in fiction tend to be exposition heavy (overtly so) and undermine much of the magic in storytelling. Having been guilty of this, reading the interactions between this client and his therapist felt like a lesson in the right way to leverage such interactions. Everything else about the story, top notch. So much change in so few words is a great accomplishment.
Thank you! I wanted Jeb and the building front and center, what was going on inside both of them, so to speak. So while the therapist was key, she was always something seen through his filter, as an annoyance first, and a catalyst for change second. Cheers.
You are a born storyteller. Or maybe you're not. Maybe you have to work very hard at your craft. I don't know. It just feels like you have that camera lens eye pointing the reader to what you want them to see. And it all feels so right. Congratulations!
Thank you, Wally. Born or not, I have been writing all my life and honing my craft one way or another since I can remember, so I appreciate you can see a glimmer of that in this piece. Sometimes it all comes together, I guess!
And isn't it amazing when it does?!?!The scenes with the therapist particularly intrigued me because I wrote a story called The Cancer Patient which takes place between a therapist and the MC and I literally had to google 'what do therapists say to clients'. I guess I didn't hit the mark, because even though I thought it was one of my better stories, it didn't get any love on Reedsy. You have showed me the way on that point.
Hehe. Guess it helps to have two therapists in my family and a few others as friends! ;)
That'll do it! And now I know who to consult if I ever decide to put a therapist in my story again. 👍
https://exampledomain.com/?u=XXXXX&o=YYYYYplease come in I beg you
Great work Molly. There is a measured transformation in the life of the main character who eventually realizes the more relatable side of the story as the story unspools. Well deserved win!
Thank you. I like reading and writing stories where the MC has some kind of transformation, so I am glad this one was effective for you. :)
This. Is. Amazing. There really is nothing more to say. Except.I read this before reading your bio and thought, she's *got* (italics) to write a novel. And you have! I'm reading it. Definitely. Almost a modern Scrounge. Very subtly done. Congrats on the win (I'm not surprised though)
Lol! I will definitely be ringing the city bells when I publish one of my two books.I'm very honored you've read all my stories!
Novels must be hard to write. Keep trying to publish them, you're a great writer, they can't fail to be published eventually. Tell me when they become available, I'll be one of the first to buy them :)
You have written a beautiful tale. Well developed and crafted. Great phrases like “He choked back a snarky whatever Obi Wan, and nodded at her. ” And“How about the rust-stained, leaking toilet and body-oil-marked tub? Should I look for Rorshachs in its grimy patterns?”I am trying to write a therapy scene for a story I am writing. I can only hope to write it as elegantly as you have! Thanks for sharing!
Great, well thought out story. I loved this. Having been lucky enough to see Marie Antionette's former home, I could relate well. Great job Molly, very well written. I enjoyed reading this very much.
Thank you so much for reading! I’m glad it channeled Versailles clearly. Been there a couple times myself, so had fun “visiting” it again. :)
Thank you so much for reading! I’m glad it channeled Versailles clearly. Been there a couple times myself, so had fun “visiting” it again. :)
Wow, very powerful. Well done!I am new to Reedsy, but easy to see why this story won.-:)RG
Thank you, Richard!
I think I detect some Christmas Carol elements to this story -- or at least I think I do. And this is a lovely, upbeat story suitable for the season. I enjoyed reading it.
Definitely a part of this story! So glad you enjoyed it. :)
Hi Molly,I think this is a real place...? I used to identify with Jeb...now I see in my simple life more blessings than I can count. I do believe our dreams have meanings...we just need to "dig deeper" to find them. I wonder, have you read Crime and Punishment? If so, was that your inspiration for this story, or was it a dream? Congratulations on a well-deserved win!
Thank you Kelsey! You must be a Minneapolitan! It sure is a real place. I drove by it one day, about a week before this competition, and laughed at its absurdity, deciding it needed to be a "character" in a story soon. I read Crime and Punishment long ago, but it wasn't a conscious inspiration, the insertion of the book itself part of the flow I was in. TBH, I wasn't conscious of any direct influence of any story until I was writing it.
no...I'm in California...but out of curiosity I googled the name! It's amazing the unconscious stuff that pours out of our fingers when we start writing...sometimes a delightful surprise to us.
Wow, there is such beautiful imagery in this story. You described the setting so perfectly, I could practically see it. It's a skill I am having trouble mastering and seeing it done so perfectly is motivating.
Thank you, Placidia! It's often a question of what to leave in and what to leave to the reader's imagination, which comes more from feel than calculated forethought. Keep on keepin' on!
Hi Molly, lovely story. Would you mind me reading this and posting a yt video of it?
Parker, I am flattered, but any chance I could get more info from you? What's your YT channel?
Really awesome writing, really great story. Congrats on your win! :)
Thank you , Julie!
pLAGRIZING THIS STORY!
I really hope you are kidding.
Such a beautiful story, such a simple and sweet message. It was easy to follow. Although life can be challenging, there is always someone we can help or something we can do to make someone's life better.Thank you for writing this story. I am a big fan and I hope you have great success.
Thank you, Danielle. I agree that we can give someone a smile, or a hello and help make their day. You never know what they are struggling with.
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